Do you want to sit in a total stranger’s piss?

Calvin PissingI know that I don’t. I’m willing to bet that it’s safe to say you don’t either. So why is it that it’s so common to walk into the restroom of an office, restaurant, etc. and find that somebody has urinated (or worse) all over the toilet seat?

It’s gotten to the point where the first thing I do when I enter a restroom is to grab two wads of paper towels, wet one handful, scrub the toilet seat, then dry it off with the other handful. Don’t bother telling me that I should just use a toilet seat protector (AKA ass gasket), either. A thin ring of paper isn’t sufficient enough to isolate my buttocks from a complete stranger’s piss, thankyouverymuch.

And don’t get me started on public restrooms, either. I totally abhor having to use a restroom at a busy public park, beach, campground, etc. — even just to take a whiz. God forbid that I have a stomach problem and need to take a seat to relieve myself. I’d almost rather just shit my own pants!

Can’t these lazy, disgusting, inconsiderate assholes try a bit more to control their urine stream? Lift the seat! Take better aim – it isn’t a sin to hold your own penis, guys! If you do happen to sprinkle, clean it the fuck up! Don’t leave it for the next person to deal with … they’re not your goddamn janitor any more than you are for the person that came in before you!

Would you do this in your own home? Would you want your friends, children, relative, or significant other to sit in your pee? Does the idea of some poor little kid sitting on your sticky, smelly bodily excretions make you happy? Something tells me that the vast majority of people would say “no” to all of these questions.

This isn’t some complicated thought process, people; this is one area where the Golden Rule affects you just as much as the next guy. Think about it.

This entry doesn’t understand why this concept is so difficult for people to grasp.